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Demons: Steps to Freedom
My Journey Through Darkness Into His Light
I want to share my story—not as an authority, not as a teacher, but as a fellow believer walking through something many of us never talk about openly. If you’ve ever wondered whether God truly wants to dwell in you, I want to bring you into the raw, unfiltered truth of my journey—through despair, demonic oppression, and into the merciful, transformative presence of the Holy Spirit.
Early Darkness
Even as a child, I sensed the darkness. My earliest memory of demons—seeing them, feeling them—was when I was about four years old. I would run to my mother’s room crying because these things frightened me beyond imagination.
By age twelve, it was worse. I experienced actual visitations: I could see them, hear them, and even feel the hot breath of one leaning in to whisper wickedness into my ear.
By fourteen, I experienced night paralysis. For those who don’t know, night paralysis is terrifying. Your body is paralyzed, yet your mind is aware as it comes out of sleep. You feel wickedness embodied, a nearly tangible evil presence in the room, but you’re unable to run away or even get your limp tongue to yell for help (if you have others in your house that could come pray for you).
Growing Up in Confusion
I didn’t know about the power of Jesus Christ at that time. Even though I was raised in the church, none of this had been taught to me there. I was told I was “saved” because I had prayed the “sinners prayer”, read my Bible, and went to church.
But every day I felt like I was drowning. Panic attacks or dictating voice of fear crippled me. Thoughts of suicide stabbed at my brain. I couldn’t function in society- I could hardly keep a job, have friends… leave my home. I couldn’t believe I was truly saved and got angry with those who said I was. But I wanted to believe them as the fear of hell was very real to me.
Because of over two and a half decades of demonic torment, I didn’t trust the Holy Spirit. I was afraid of Him. If anyone mentioned being filled with the Spirit, I would recoil. I didn’t realize then that my fear was both my flesh and the demons trying to keep me from God. Demons are clever. They know our inner thoughts and can mimic them, making us think we’re thinking our own thoughts when it’s really them. But ultimately, its our decision to concede to their harassment and temptations or not.
God’s Call
After about 13 years of this horrid existence, one afternoon God called me clearly. Not with force. Not with loud words. But with a quiet insistence. I felt it deep in my spirit—a gentle tug: “Come to Me. I want to set you free.”
His call wasn’t harassing, but it was persistent even when I initially resisted. Even with all those years of listening to the wrong voices—the voices of demons & my own flesh—could not drown out His call.
Welcoming the Holy Spirit
I obeyed. I went to my room, closed my eyes and listened to Him speak. He told me to say out loud:“I welcome the Holy Spirit of Yahweh into me.” I repeated it multiple times, maybe for three to five minutes.
And then the most unearthly, beautiful thing happened. I felt my chest expand—not like a balloon, but a definite presence, a pressure, a tangible holiness. Words fail me, but it was like pure light, pure holiness.
I moved naturally, without thinking—like how our hands move when we talk – we don’t think about the directions, yet our hands move as we will them to. This is how the Holy Spirit guided me without command! In perfect unity with His will. It was unlike anything I had ever experienced before or after.
Breathing Out Demons
But then it got intense. The demons were not happy. They were panicking. The Holy Spirit told me: “Breathe them out. We’re going to name them, and we’re going to breathe them out.”
That’s exactly what I did. I won’t name all the demons to save me some embarrassment, but I will mention the demon of death, which had lodged itself through my past suicide attempts. When it came time to expel it, It dug its claws in- literally, into the sides of my throat- resisting fiercely.
Naturally I started to feel panic rise up in me – but because the Holy Spirit was present, I didn’t freak out. I exhaled, coughed, and expelled it by the Holy Spirit’s power (not mine). Other demons followed. I would name them aloud as the Holy Spirit directed me, and breathe them out.
They could not remain. Hallelujah! There is no place for evil where God is truly welcomed. If you are repentant and submitted, it cannot stay.
Daily Obedience After Deliverance
But deliverance is only the beginning. Once a demon is expelled, you must make Jesus Christ Lord over that area of your life. If the demon of lying is cast out, you must not return to lies. You must remain in obedience and holiness. Otherwise, the enemy will attempt to return.
It is a battle—but the power of Jesus Christ is stronger than any demon. Daily discipline must be learned and worked for. Like an athlete training for the Olympics you really gotta put your focus and effort into making it happen and it has to be a daily commitment. Yes, up and downs happen but you can’t stay down. God is VERY forgiving and He will welcome you back every single time you fall, but just be making sure that you’re going back and not staying in the sin- because the longer you stay down the harder is to get back up.
After 26 years in bondage, the normal things most people take for granted—friendships, healthy relationships, working a job, even enjoying life like vacations or just going out shopping—became possible for me. Before that I couldn’t do those things without intense effort to go against the dominating internal feelings of self hate, unworthiness, rejection, fear, hatred to others, etc. I’d usually lose energy and forfeit whatever outing I have been longing to do because the inner voices were too strong for me that day. And I’d spend another day alone breeding more bitterness, loneliness, sadness, brewing into hatred for myself, towards others, self-pity and bitterness festered and thoughts of suicide, started to become attractive, again… so when all of those voices had been evicted, and the Holy Spirit sat in their place- I had this freedom I never experienced before… and to my shame, I admit I miss used it. I pursued living in all these “innocent/borderline” entertainment, and pleasures that I felt I had “missed out on”. Even then the Holy Spirit was patient with me and continue to work with me and over the years I learned that deliverance does not erase all struggles instantly. It requires daily surrender to the Holy Spirit, constant vigilance, and adherence to God’s truth. Reading, digging into His Word as my “lifesaver”, my protection from demons and guidance away from the deathly path ever human heart left to itself wants to walk.
Deception by a Satanist
Because I’ve fallen back into sin at times, I’ve reaped the bitter fruit of those choices. I’ve faced illness and spiritual attack, including from human agents used by satanic powers.
One of the most deceptive was a Satanist who masqueraded as a Christian. He did Bible studies with me, spoke like a fellow believer, and gained my trust, all while he was actively conjuring demons against me, one particular was identified as “the spirit of Lucifer”. These were no lightweight demons, maybe I’ll wrote another post or video in the details later. The Holy Spirit revealed the truth, but I refused to obey and believe Him over this man. Things got ugly, and I finally obeyed the Lord and removed him from my life. But the battle he waged spiritually left scars & physical infections I still am battling with God’s help today.
Ongoing Deliverance and Hope
Even in the midst of healing, the Holy Spirit has made clear that forgiveness is available if we repent and turn to Jesus every single time we stumble or fall. I do not hold to the “once saved, always saved” mindset from personal experience—regular repentance and obedience are vital. Those who stumble and fall back into sin have a heavier burden to bear, but God’s mercy remains sufficient. His grace is new every morning.
So if you are reading this and feel trapped, tormented, or isolated, know this: you are not alone. You can be delivered, even if you have no one but Jesus, the Holy Spirit, and our Father in Heaven. You can breathe out demons. You can expel darkness. You can claim His light.
I recommend this book: (no affiliation) Derek Prince “They shall expel demons.” Very insightful to the Biblical teachings on how to submit to God and get free in Him.
Final Thoughts
This is the journey God has called me to share—not as a teacher, not as an expert—but as someone who has walked through hell and found His presence waiting. I share it with you to encourage, to give hope, and to remind you that God truly desires to dwell within us.
Ask for a clean slate each morning. Let His mercy wash over you. Saturate yourself in His Word. Let abide in you, don’t choose your flesh or demons temptations over it. Protect it in your heart that you may not sin against Him (Psalm 119:11 AMPC). Walk in His Spirit. Believe His truth over the lies. Begin hosting the Spirit instead of housing darkness.
If this post has blessed you, I hope you will share it. And I pray that as you continue on your journey, you too will experience the transformative, liberating, holy presence of God.
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